From happy to cringy

Something hit me at about 4pm this afternoon.

All of a sudden, I felt bleahhh.  Bleahhh in a way that, I just don’t feel like doing anything anymore for the rest of the day. I immediately stopped what I was working on, got up from my seat, left my desk, walked towards the middle of the office and with my hands on my hips, declared to one of my colleagues, “Suddenly I don’t want to do anything anymore. I am DONE with this bullshit”

I don’t know where that came from, really. Apart from the fact that silly Christmas songs have been playing in my head all day,  I have been nothing but extremely focused on getting a some things done before I leave the office at 6pm today. Yet, somehow, just like that, something in my head snapped.  

I think the holiday mood just hit me.

Suddenly I felt the springs in my feet, my spirits uplifted and I felt really happy that I’ll be taking a few days off till mid next week. (no Christmas holiday here in Thailand - off days have got to come from the annual leave!) . I packed up quickly and left the office with a surge of super happy energy all around, feeling excited to get home and see my kids as soon as I can.

The moment I got home though (after being stuck in traffic for more than half an hour), I saw something which riled me up completely - the AC in the living room and the foam mats on the floor were pretty much plastered with some sort of cream. Next to the splotches stood Spud, who quickly went “uh oh!” the moment she realised that she made a mess. While there were no opened jar (she cleverly put the jar back in its place, lid half closed), I quickly figured out that she had quietly been playing with Squirt’s jar of Sudo Crème when no one was looking.

I wanted to initially let it go, but when I discovered that the cream went all over the AC vent and the possibility of some going into the filter, I went mad. I was so mad that I punished Spud with no TV time after her shower – something which she was quite upset about at first. While I realised that I was being a little too harsh, I was not about to relent because I was really, really, really angry as Spud knows better that she was not supposed to be playing with any of those creams! Realizing that I was quite angry at her, she calmed down, really listened to me, had her milk, and stared at the blank TV screen quietly while sitting CALMLY on my chair till I was ready to put her to bed after I settled Squirt down.

Things got a little bit more interesting when I went to Squirt’s room to prepare him for bedtime – I discovered that his bed was infested with a bunch of ants! It was the ickiest sight I have ever seen; so icky and disgusting that the sight of those ants clustering on his bed sheet gave me severe goose bumps. I should have taken a picture, but because of all the stress, I didn’t as the Nanny was quick enough to help me clean up. I cringed and I cringed and I cringed,

I have no idea where those ants came from – and according to our nanny, that was the 2^nd time in the day where she had discovered ants’ infestation in his bed. In fact, she had even put on a fresh new bed sheet before I put Squirt to bed. The worst part is, we have absolutely no frickin’ idea where these ants came from. We have had ants’ infestation in our home for months now, but to see them clustering in one of our kids’ bed is just too eerie.

And I hate, hate, hate frickin’ ants! They all need to die!!!

Needless to say, I was stressed. The holiday feeling I had earlier was gone. Now I am just worried sick of my child being eaten alive by ants while sleeping in his cot, alone in his room. I am not so sure I would sleep so well tonight.

Fucking ants.